The Art Of Moral Ascendancy: How To Positively Influence The Lives Of Humans

“The purpose of life is not to be happy – but to matter, to be productive, to be useful, to have it make some difference that you have lived at all.”
~ Leo Rosten

Post written by Kevin Tyler Smith. Connect with me on Twitter. I always enjoy meeting new people.

While growing up, I never was the most physically gifted person. Yes, I had pretty good coordination but that never translated to any great athletic physical prowess.

My list of wishes included wanting to be the fastest runner, the highest jumper and simply the best at any sport. You have to understand that relatively speaking, in the mind of a child this was really a big deal for me but…

Guess what?

Yep, you guessed it…my wish list never came to fruition and that was difficult for me to accept years ago but as I think back, what really mattered was the sincere encouraging words spoken to me by teachers, coaches and peers the like. They knew that whatever effort I put forth was the best for me and just to hear, “Good job Kevin” meant the world to me. The power of positive influence through words became abundantly clear during those times.

The Watershed Moment….Share the Love

Every once in a while, people need encouragement, especially during their times of trouble and doubt. These times of reservation presents us with the perfect opportunity to exercise what the human being was designed to do…to show fellowship, communication and love.

Offering encouragement to others is a powerful and enlightening habit. What most people do not realize is those who are doing the encouraging are typically more encouraged than the recipient. Moral ascendancy shown to others is a form of empowerment - when you empower others, you empower yourself.

Your Positive Influence Arsenal

Here are six simple ways to effectively and positively influence other people and preserve the inherent human birthright of fellowship through your deeds of encouragement:

1. Use encouraging words - using words of encouragement is an effective way of offering support Let them know you are behind them 100 percent. Using statements such as “well done” or “good job” are extremely efficacious, especially if given at the perfect time. Remind them that you commend them on their effort and that they should keep doing what they’re doing.

Here are some encouraging quotes that could restore confidence:

• “It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed”. – Theodore Roosevelt
• “The greatest mistake you can make in life is to continually be afraid you will make one”. – Elbert Hubbard
• “Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortunes; but great minds rise above them”. – Washington Irving
• “Nothing will ever be attempted if all possible objections must first be overcome”. – Samuel Johnson
• “What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly”. – Richard Bach
• “Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds”. – Albert Einstein
• “Fortune favors the brave”. – Publius Terence
• “Rome was not built in one day”. – Idiom

2. Don’t say a word – WARNING: this method will be counter-intuitive to using encouraging words but I think you will understand what I mean. Sometimes what is unsaid speaks volumes. Through the natural flow of being present with someone needing encouragement you will be able to easily discern if anything needs to be said. Sometimes a zipped lip is all they need to hear.

3. Be sincere - this is one of my favorite ways to encourage. I honestly believe, somehow by osmosis, by showing true sincerity you are cast in the same situation as the one you are encouraging. This is comforting to them because as we all know, misery loves company. Just make sure your heart is in what you are saying. Show some genuine interest and sincerity in your encouragement by asking questions and talking more with them. You can actually get people more energized once you can get them to talk more about their plans and what they are doing. Talking forces them to think even more thus transmuting their thoughts to valiant efforts.

4. Seek their advice - so many people overlook this approach. I suppose it’s because it is not your everyday conventional tactic. Think about this though, instead of giving the other person a ton of advice, flip the script. Ask for their advice for a change. This can help influence their feeling of being in control, as well as give them confidence in their ability. Asking for help can be flattering to the one being asked, as this shows that you have confidence in what they know enough for you to seek the help that you are looking for from them.

5. Offer your help - most of the time, people who need encouragement are the last ones to admit that they do, so it would be good if you can actually offer your help to that person. Lending them your helping hand can help show them that you are willing to offer your energy and time to help them out on their endeavor, thereby giving them more reasons to finish what they are doing and not give up.

When offering your help, however, don’t push the issue too much, especially if they don’t feel too comfortable in accepting your offer, as this can only irritate them and could even create more problems for you both later on. Just offer your help when you find an opportunity to give it and if they really want it, then they will accept it.

“It is the greatest of all mistakes to do nothing because you can only do little – do what you can.” ~ Sydney Smith

6. Be positive - this is one method that just seems to come more naturally to me than others as I am forever “the glass is half full” guy. I always use positive statements and avoid negative statements when trying to encourage other people. Maintaining a positive disposition can actually affect how they are thinking. If you want to positively influence other people, then use positive statements that will help encourage them to do even better and not give up.

“Colors fade, temples crumble, empires fall, but wise words endure.”
~ Edward Thorndike

A simple positive response even in a tough or negative situation can go a long way and sometimes change a person’s life. When was the last time you used sincere encouragement to positively influence someone without reason? Did you feel invigorated by being a rock by their side during a tough time?

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